Rick's Story

Until the age of 7 I was living with my Mum, Dad and Brother in the New Forest in a fairly secure life. The first thing I knew of the end of that security was my Dad sitting on the edge of my bed one night explaining that he'd always love me whatever happened. I can't remember how much of the details he gave me, but not long after my parents separated and my mum, my bother and I were moving to Devon where I would spend the next part of my life until the age of 18. The biggest problem was my mum had to be -mum and dad- as my father took the decision (or non-decision) to be 99% absent for those 11 years. Mum slowly put her life back together as discovered the enduring love of God for herself.

At 18 it was another critically hard time of life for me; just starting University and being away from my home for the first time; coping with all the change of new responsibilities, socially and practically was very stressful. I remember one night being pretty home sick and sitting on my bed in my student halls; the weird thing was I realised at that point that I was blaming my dad for how I was feeling, how lost and lonely in the world I was. He should have been there to give me strength and tell how exactly to live my life. During my previous 11 years I had developed a nice cosy nonchalance about my fathers abscence, fully taking refuge in the father role my mother tried to play in her parenting duality. But now away from both my parents, my dad became my focus and I began to loathe him. As I sat there on my bed, just as he sat performing his goodbye speech 11 years earlier I wept, and there in that little box room that had become my life, I picked up a bible and God spoke to me. He told me He was my true father and I had to give everything to Him to begin to live - truly live. This meant forgiving my dad completely; a task that seemed inconceivable until God showed me how I was myself forgiven and He was giving me power in the person of Jesus to forgive my dad, all I had to do was take that step.

A few weeks later I did just that while visiting my mother's church in Devon. God came and game me the amazing ability to completely release my dad from any debt to me; to forgive him and love him as the father God had chosen for me long before I was born. At that point I stepped into a new life with my father in heaven and found a new world open up to me. This person Jesus had not only done something amazing on the cross getting me to God; but also was with me now, and wanted me to live in the fullness of my father in heaven who had made all things for me to enjoy in all he is.

15 years on and I can conclusively say that there is no better life than one lived trusting every day to my father in heaven, and seeing his hand changing me to be more and more like him.

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